Bye Bye Buffet

It’s official. It’s gone. The Coastal Pacific Buffet is not coming back. The nautical culinary all-you-can-eat luxury restaurant service which has graced BC Ferries running between Tsawwassen and Swartz Bay is going the way of the Titanic. Sunk, forever. Seafood for the nostalgic in all of us.

This will not surprise recent travelers including yours truly. On many recent trips, looking for something more interesting than the bookstore, having struggled to find stable Wi-Fi and having watched the trip through Active Pass one too many times, I have searched for substance and style only to find a lonely sign “The Coastal Buffet is closed until further notice.” Sigh!

Shuttered initially through COVID restrictions, the enterprise has lost money for most years since full hot and cold food service began in 1978. Requiring seven staff to operate, and given increased costs of food, supply chain issues, and a number of logistical issues, the writing has been on the wall for some time.

Now BC Ferries has launched (sic) an online survey to gather ideas for re-allocation of the space. To date leading contenders are: a casino (how inspired), an exercise and workout space (a great use for this high price and well positioned real estate?), a sports bar (how about watching water skiing?), and the best yet, more seating capacity (the most likely outcome).

Well it will not surprise my readers to learn that I have some ideas myself. How about bowling? We have lost so many of our favourite lanes in recent years. I bet some would simply take the ferry to go bowling. Leave the car in the lot (where BC Ferries likely makes most of its money). You get ninety minutes two ways each passage. Don’t run for the cafeteria when you board. Run for your favourite lane. Balls supplied.

Or better still, how about a pool hall. Given the large amount of space, you could set up like ten tables. Snooker, Billiards and Eight-ball could coexist as a trinity of entertainments. You would need minimum age of say, eighteen, otherwise the felts might be damaged. Only one staff person would be required, and hey, no booze—Keeps things really simple. As for the influence of the ship’s movement on game play, well it’s just one more challenge to manage. Pretty sure they had this on the Titanic. I will check.

Another idea, an Escape Room. These are increasingly popular in municipalities and at attractions  throughout our province. Personally I have absolutely no enthusiasm for these. Given physical challenges I now get lost in shopping malls, Superstore parking lots, and farmers’ markets. For me, life itself requires escape skills. Others however love the rush of voluntary incarceration, often accompanied by dim light and incomprehensible exit routes. The biggest problem I foresee with this option is when the nice person comes on the public address system advising: “Attention passengers. We are nearing Swartz Bay Terminal. Please make your way down to the car deck as we will arrive at our destination shortly.” Potential problem ahead.

As you can see, there are many options for future use of the space previously reserved for fine and unlimited dining. I do have one final suggestion, arguably the best yet, a use incalculably valuable to both “man and beast.” A Dog Park. Think about it. The time is right, especially as BC Ferries is considering allowing dogs on the Promenade Deck on a trial basis. Think about it. You can’t expect dogs to read papers in the gift shop; they can’t enter the other eateries; they can walk the decks for sure but on wet and stormy days they will be soaking when returned to the car.

No, an interior dog park, complete with water refreshment, with a place to dispose of poop, some seating for owners, and treats for visitors would be just grand. Spoiler alert—I have not figured out how to deal with urinary discharge. Open to ideas on this one.

Think of the joy on every canine face, the energy of every wagging tail, the thrill of every woof, bark, and bounce. Think of the smile of children, of seniors no longer to care for their animals, and the delight of BC Ferries staff knowing that their service has provided much more than transport, but pleasure.