Juno’s bad hair day

Another reflection from Juno, Summerland’s 4 year-old Labradoodle blogger.

Help me, please; I am having a bad hair day. In fact for the last week or so it has become evident to me and my MaPaw that I need grooming. The problem is that my former groomer has moved away. Despite MaPaw’s best efforts, a new groomer is proving hard  to find. And the prices—as supply collides with demand—have risen significantly.

So is to worth the cost? I think so; it’s actually necessary. You see, if my hair grows too long I have trouble seeing; MaPaw does a good job of small facial trims thankfully. With summer now arrived I swim most days, so my hair gets grubby and sometimes it mats,  especially around the ears and tail.

So I have now set myself a task. With the assistance of Dr. Google (though not Auntie AI yet) I am on the hunt for a new, affordable groomer with good credentials, a pleasant disposition, and a pawsitive reputation. I checked out Yelp and other business promotional sites. I have scoured social media including Facebook, but it seems everyone is looking for groomers right now. As we are short of groomers in the South Okanagan (as we are bereft of family physicians) most are not taking on new clients. Grr.

In desperation, I next searched out groomers at the big box pet stores. Finally, success, though not without a little confusion. Shopping for a groomer at PetSmart or other similar outlets is as complicated as booking a Westjet Flight. Back in the day, when you booked  with WJ you simply booked your flight; put some money down, and showed up on time. Now you show up earlier and earlier in preparation for extended wait times—weather delays; equipment malfunction; geopolitical unrest. At the time of online purchase (does anyone use travel agents these days?) you decide whether to bring checked or cabin luggage; you may or many not pay for seat selection or booking options; you accept or decline insurance—everytime we book a new option appears. One wonders if one day you will save money by bringing your own oxygen or pay extra for pay toilets.

Sorry, got carried away about air travel. Back however to the pet store. I just want a basic grooming, what PaPaw calls a haircut. No fancy conditioners, colouring, defrizzing; no special entertainment during treatment—some dentists now provide movies and livestream performances. Spa options now available to me now include:  Bath and Brush (fine); Bath and Brush with FURminator (rhymes with terminator); or a puppy bath (I like puppies, right Laura Bird?).

Sometimes it feels like we privileged consumer critters have too much choice. Neoliberal capitalism demands that consumer competition and cost override creativity. All these options sound worthy, especially administered by a bather in training, part of a grooming academy where supervised salon trainers assist the next generation of canine stylists. We don’t however need them, in my furried opinion (IMFO).

Well, I just want a groomer to reshape my furry life, to chase away my bad hair days, all in a reasonable time frame (three hours maximum) at a reasonable price. Is this too much to ask? Weigh in folks. Suggestions welcome. Woof.