Jeff’s question

My colleague and friend, Jeff, recently emailed the following question to me:

“Hi Ken — just wondering how you’re doing these days?  So much terribly difficult stuff going on, all at once. We are struggling with it — working a lot through the emotions, especially grief and frustration.   Around here, most everyone is experiencing that.”  

It’s an important question, to which I respond from my place in  space and time—now just days before the inauguration of the First Felon as president of the United States; as Los Angeles wildfires rage; as a tentative peace agreement between Israel and Hamas struggles for traction; as Joe Biden spoke last night prophetically of the ascendancy of tech oligarchs; as right-shifting politics lurk in many countries including Canada; as Anglicans locally and nationally try to discern next steps in the evolution of ministry and witness—it’s all a bit much right now. As Jeff said: “So much terribly difficult stuff going on, all at once.”

My reply to Jeff initially included these points:

1. The dog; our life is built around her; she is remarkably consistent in her affection and brings such joy to our lives; she distracts us marvellously;
2. Social interaction in our little town is so very life-giving; small is beautiful; longtime and newfound friends alike;
3. As long as I can be creative, I am well. I have enough though not too much church engagement through which I can still be quite creative;
4. I enjoy writing as never before; my blog continues to grow in popularity and depth; each and every day I connect with at least fifty unique readers, mostly from N. America though some from elsewhere;
5. Kathie and I watch way too much British crime-drama on TV; didn’t Vera end beautifully;
6. I read as much as possible, at least between sleeps 😊; one often follows the other;

A few days since my first response to Jeff, and having thought through my responses a bit more I have a few additional suggestions. When I feel overwhelmed, when I crave ways to deal with my sense of lostness or powerlessness, here are some things that I do:

• Disengage with social media. This never lasts very long for me personally, but as I receive daily feeds from a variety of media sources, I am sometimes able to say to myself, “enough for now.” Social media is such a mixed (up) blessing;
• Force myself to get out of the house as often as possible to engage with our community. While Kathie and I don’t attend every week, our local Okanagan Reconciliation Learning Circle is one way we meet with others who care about the common good, who appreciate the value of healthy relationships, who seek to learn ways and means to make healing and reconciliation part of our lives.
• I remind myself of the good old fashioned Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference.

While dark days lie ahead, where the influence of global geopolitical shifts continues apace, even here in our little town of Summerland, I know I can’t fix many things. I/we are not however without positive influence. What I try to do is poke around in the dark with whatever light I can find. Cue Gospel song: This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.”

For myself and others:

1. Get into the arts. Listen to music of all sorts and styles; doodle, draw, delve into art history, attend local theatre. If indeed “all the world’s a stage” find a local one and volunteer—onstage, backstage, front of house, promotion, or best of all, buy a season ticket.
2. Practice prayer, mindfulness or other spiritual disciplines as countercultural resistance. I do these less than all my other suggestions above. More to say about these in a future blog post.
3. Take the words of the late Jack Layton to heart. In honouring Jack, we respect each other and bless creation:

“My friends, love is better than anger.
Hope is better than fear.
Optimism is better than despair.
So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic.
And we’ll change the world.”

Enough for now? I think so. As Red Green used to say, “keep your stick on the ice.”