Jann Arden — Always surprises

Reposted from Facebook

I am getting married in 12 days. There isn’t a single thing anyone could have ever said or done to have prepared me for the future I find myself standing in right now. It is as surreal and as deliciously whimsical as you might imagine.

Change is the thing that makes us who we are. The constant shifting of opinions and perspectives that force us to dig deeper into our own humanity. What would be the point of being here at all, wandering around in bodies that are static and banal and well, stuck in the mire of ignorance? Indeed, my battle cry for over a decade was, ‘Never again! No more relationships for me! I am so happy to be on my own! Alone- NOT the least bit lonely’… You know the rest.

As I have gotten older, there are countless things that I appreciate about my own gathered wisdom, as flawed as it may be at times, it is MY wisdom. I mostly live with the absence of doubt; my decisions are filled with grace rather than relentless consternation. My friendships are hard core, over flowing with forgiveness and loyalty and mercy. I have fewer of them, but that is bound to happen when you shift directions and heal yourself.

It’s sometimes difficult for others to stand in your peace of mind- as it can become a reminder to their own need to heal themselves. I have had many ex’s come forward in the last year wanting to ‘get back together’, because as Thordis wisely pointed out at the time-, “They want the ‘fixed’ you. The ‘sober’ you. The ‘together’ you.

I am getting married to my absolute truest love, to my most pure and dearest soul companion. She is intelligent and charismatic and intrepid and bold and brave and as kick ass as anyone I have ever met. I was in awe of her within seconds of laying eyes on her at the Iceland writers retreat almost 16 months ago. It was instant, cosmic, ancient and connected. She— was always the place where I was going to land.

Why get married—? There are far too many ‘why’s’ But just for arguments sake, well, because the patriarchy always needs to be reminded of the autonomy of ALL women— sis,gay, straight, trans, non binary. The patriarchy needs to be reminded of a woman’s right to self governance, the ability to act independently, the ability to determine their own actions, their own rules and principles. We need to remind the holders of the power (for now)— that we have political and moral autonomy over everything we do and say.

That’s part of why.

The other why, is LOVE.

You don’t have to agree, you don’t have to like it, you also don’t have to marry me.

What an adventure this life is.

Falling, will always be more exciting to me, than flying.

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